Inverness has a relatively small city centre, so it’s often quite hard to avoid invaders when they appear.

Mormons, for instance, used to be quite high profile around town, but I’ve not seen them – or had them on my doorstep – for some time now, which is good.

Chuggers are the latest invaders – accosting people in the street to ask them to sign up to various charitable causes. I find their aggressive attempts to squeeze money out of people when they’re attempting to just go about their lives to be a poor reflection of the causes they work for, as well as exceptionally rude.

Today, while doing various bits and bobs in town with Nicole, who was through for the weekend, we were confronted on three occasions by chuggers, with a variety of cheeky and over-personal banter failing to stop us in our stride. I am pleased to report I managed to be rude back to them in three different and original ways.

I think I might start taking my bible into town with me in the future, so if I get stopped by a chugger I can attempt to pray over them, offer them healing, or read scriptures to them until they run, screaming.